


Forget Me Not

by Katraa



Category: Subarashiki Kono Sekai | The World Ends With You
Genre: Angst, Friendship, Gen, M/M, Suicide, pre-game
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-25
Updated: 2013-05-25
Packaged: 2017-12-12 22:11:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,307
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/816621
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Katraa/pseuds/Katraa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The emptiness of the room seemed to mirror his entire being at that moment: no student desks and barely any furniture shoved against the surroundings walls.   It wasn't inviting, per say. Laying here in the absolute silence, he could almost hear the little brat's condescending voice.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Forget Me Not

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Zilleniose](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zilleniose/gifts).



They were worried about him - or at least, that's what his psychiatrist said earlier that morning when he showed up at school after five consecutive days of absences.  Rather, Neku figured, they were worried about the likelihood of him falling and with such a prestigious preparatory school such as this, a student failing was _the_ absolute worst.  Neku had slipped away from the lunch tables outside in favor or heading to the second floor.  There was an itch in the back of his mind that urged him up the stairs and into the corner class-room that was often shaded by the cherry blossoms outside.

Once there, Neku made a move to sit on the edge of the teacher's desk; this room was used for recreational activities after school hours, most specifically the Student Council, but ever since _the incident_ it had been eerily vacant.  Neku's index finger lingered on the 'next' button of his MP3.  How long had it been now?  A week?  A sickening feeling grew in the pit of his stomach, twisting, _turning_.

Weakly, Neku's free hand reached up and dragged at the knot his tie.  To be specific, it had been fixed up in a half-windsor earlier that morning but now it felt as if the proper name should have been, 'the asphyxiator'.  Once loosened, Neku shifted to lay flat back against the desk.  

In the fading afternoon sun the cherry blossoms outside cast gorgeous shapes on the room's walls.  Not a single spot was left untouched by warm, red light and shadows.  

The last time he had been in here?  Well, it was after the main student council meeting.  Joshua had asked him to stay after a few minutes to finish up the committee's budget.  The other had a few questions regarding the prices of supplies and the estimated attendees, apparently, and Neku figured it wouldn't take long.  Everything had _seemed normal_.  There were no signs, no indications.  Nothing.  Just the usual chitter-chatter.

And perhaps that should have been the red-flag.  It was _normal_.   Joshua was never normal and any conversation had between the pair was often dashed with sarcasm and an abundance of childish teasing.   Sometimes it bordered line on heavy and Neku's head hurt afterward - but not nearly as much as his heart that threatened to pulse right out of his chest - but there had been  _no signs_.

Was it something he had said?

Neku bit his bottom lip and brought his hand up and over his eyes.  The sun was setting rapidly and now there was a particularly gruesome glare right in his face.  The emptiness of the room seemed to mirror his entire being at that moment: no student desks and barely any furniture shoved against the surroundings walls.   It wasn't inviting, per say.

Laying here in the absolute silence, he could almost _hear_ the little brat's condescending voice.

" _Are you really going to lay around on the job, Neku?  I didn't pick you as head of the committee for nothing."_

Neku laughed hollowly, the corners of his eyes stinging as his nails dug at their corners.   "Yeah?" he asked the empty air, "A little help would have been great, asshole."

" _Tsk-tsk, swearing on school grounds?  You should be ashamed…"_

"Fuck you," Neku nearly spat, his voice cracking as he rolled over on his side, sucking in a labored breath.   Here, no one saw him.  Here, no one would care if he was weak and cried.  Here, he could talk to air and get away with it and _cope_.

" _Would you like to?   You always say that and never do anything about it, Ne-ku."_

Any other time his face would have burned red right up to his ears and he would have slammed his hand over Joshua's mouth to shut him up because joking about same-sex relations _here_ was the worst idea possible.     Now, however, all Neku did was wince and remove his hand from his eyes.   "Not like it matters anymore."

There was a troubling quietness that rose up.  " _Of course it matters.  Ghosts have feelings too."_

"No, they don't," Neku whispered, pained.  "You're not really here, Josh.   I get that now.  You're not really here anymore and I can't keep telling myself that.  People think I'm crazy."

" _And people didn't think I was?"_   There was a venom appearing in the other's voice.  " _Seeing dead people is far more condemning than hearing them."_

_"_ I never thought you were crazy," Neku choked out, his hands balling into tiny fists - it was the only way he kept himself from crying.  "I told you that.  I believed you.  Joshua, I…"

" _Enough, Neku.  It's over now."_

"Damnit, Joshua.  Don't dismiss me!" Neku growled out, slamming his fist down.  "Stop _doing that_."

The voice was quiet before hesitantly continuing on, " _Oh?  What happened to wanting me to stop complicating things?"_

Neku froze, his hand that had slammed against the hard metal of the desk freezing.  "What?" he whispered to no one in particular - because Joshua was dead, _dead_ , and he was talking to _air_.  "I never said.."  But he had.  He was tired of Joshua trying to make everything perfect when it didn't need to be, tired of Joshua complicating his life with talks of dead people and refusing to see Neku's unwavering devotion. 

" _I was ill, Neku.   Don't flatter yourself with thinking your offhanded comment was the reason."_

Neku grit his teeth, hard. "Why did you give up?  When did you stop _trying_?"

He swore he heard the airy giggle, not there but entirely too real all at once, " _When you stopped believing in me."_

"I never…!"  That comment hadn't meant that, it really hadn't, and his stomach knotted, tangled, made him feel like he was upside-down on a roller coaster.  "Joshua--"

But that familiar pretense was gone and Neku was left sitting in a classroom, staring down at his hands in dismay.  His best friend, the only person that had understood him, had tried to break down those walls, was gone, and he had just talked to him, in his head or not, and it had ended like _that_.  Neku bit back the bile that was surfacing in his mouth and he shut his eyes tightly, refusing to look at the world around him.    This was his _fault_ , he blamed _himself_ , now.

He…  For what, now?

A troubling feeling loomed over him and he opened his eyes.  Why were they stinging red?  Why was he still in this classroom?   A dizziness he hadn't felt for awhile crept up and he looked around.  When did he get here?  Was he after school for club, or…  He shook his head.   Maybe if checked his phone…

No texts.  As usual.  Not like anyone really had his number.

"…Guess I better head home," he murmured, apathetically, weakly, boredly.

He couldn't shake the feeling that something had shifted, that something was different.  He made his way back home, begirding the city around him, glaring at anyone who strode too close, who was too loud or who gave him a weird stare for his hair.  This city was suffocating.

Everyone was so selfish here.  This Shibuya was fucked and he felt miserable, day in and day out.  This was hell and he hated it all and just wanted to block it all out with Music.   He wanted to be away from all the selfish, superficial idiots that roamed the streets.

And with such a thought, his mind was completely devoid of any recollection, any possibility that someone could be selfless enough to value him above all else.  Above the money, the fame, the school..

In the end, he was the perfect Entry Fee for one up-and-coming Composer.

One that could never be returned when the Game was never won and the seat was usurped.

Entry fees weren't meant to be given back.

Especially when they were memories.

 


End file.
